life is hard but wow, I'm still alive and kicking

No one tell any one, especially their children that life is hard, I guess. My parents certainly do not, they are too busy with work and have no time for family and friends. Me & my brothers don't even know who our cousin is, if they don't live near us. I don't know why they are so busy until they don't even know what's going on and don't seems to have time to care but now that I have all grow up, and life is hard, I started to realize something. Maybe just maybe, I though, my parents life is so hard coz they are so poor then, that they turn to earning money to make life easier and in that process of earning money, coz life's hard for them and they have to feed kids at the same time, so they just melt in the system like everybody else. Working hard and harder for money and nothing else matter and day by day pass, they lost the the way to communicate with their children, and everyone else and there, the children grow up without guidance, and as the child grow, they realize that they are missing life, they don't know what is life and don't know what to live for and deep down in their hearts they blame the parents for not understanding, for not guiding, for who knows what...

Yes, I'm guilty, coz when I'm in my teens, I blame my mom. Blame her for not understanding me, blame her for not letting me go college coz she can afford at that time, blame her for looking down on girls, blame her for not educating me, blame her coz she always provide the best for my brothers but not me. She always think, that I'm useless I guess, and that made me feel insecure and useless all my life, but what to blame any more. I guess, no point blaming anyone coz my life is already so hard, coz I'm not making enough money so I can't really care what negative thinking she has about me, but to concentrate on finding my own life. 

I always try to understand why my mom thinks and do the things she's doing to me, that is making my life miserable. I'm already sad enough, pathetic enough but she keep on splashing salt to all my wound now and then. Anyway, maybe coz we are Chinese? coz Chinese always favor the boys? and make the boy into pampered spoiled brats, and let the girl rot. But hey, not sure why, I guess I love her, yes, I love my mom and I guess I'm willing to let go of what ever hurtful words she say to me. Maybe I owe her and she owe me in our previous life, so we are paying each other dept, or whatever you may called that, but I'm pretty sure, that's her attitude, and nothing can change that, so just let it be, hopefully one day, when I lucky enough to become someone successful, then she can stop mind hurting me, look me in the eye and be a little proud that she has a daughter like me, that I can only hope & pray for now. And yes, she's my real mother, I look at my birth certificate and oh, ok.. she's the real deal and I have to live with it " that was when I'm still a teenage", I though I'm not hers so I look for it. Now, I always joke about it to my friends, of how I look high and low for the birth cert coz I'm so sure I'm not hers XD hahaha feel so stupid back then ..

So much had happen, in my life recently. I now can clearly look at human and what they are capable of doing, things happen around me, I look at people's behaver differently, some I think I understand, some I don't, some I think how could they, what's wrong with them, some are just so twisted, lier lier pants on fire.... if you are a little lamp in this world, like me, do be careful coz many wolfs out there are trying to eat us up T_T but don't be discourage, there will always be good people, just that, are we lucky enough to meet them in our life? So never do really bad things, coz I guess KARMA will come and bite you one day... and then you'll know in your life why you are not that lucky..

Anyway,

Recently I call my mom, coz been sometime I din call her up to talk, we were talking then suddenly she change topic, she talk to me in  bahasa melayu, she say "you siapa, salah telefon" (who are you, wrong number) and she hang up, I'm not surprise but I was deeply hurt, "again". You see, if she suddenly change, it will always be my elder brother is somewhere near. She's so psycho when it comes to my elder brother. I will never in my life understand why her love for her elder son turn into being afraid of him, and I don't think my elder brother hate me that 100%, ok ok, maybe he hate me 98% but I guess not 100% and not until that she can't even talk to me when he's around, bull shit.. but my mom as always, makes me feel there's something wrong with me, and everything is my fault and so. It's really hard for me as a kid, as a teen, as a person, but, I thank God, coz I can still be consider lucky compared to others. I'm learning, and trying to understand why people do the things they do and slowly I'm letting go of the pass and I pray and hope God would give me more chance to make a difference in my life & others and of coz, hopefully God will let me win some lottery, hahaha 

but really, I need the money haha, to create my dream :D hahahaha,

Ok, serious, my mind is my power, so is yours, don't dig into the pass and blame, blame, blame, coz no matter what you do, the pass can't be change and you still have to live with that crap. Look ahead, and I guess you will be happier.

So, about the my mind is my power, so is yours thing. With mind power, who knows, you may turn that into something really wonderful and your dream may come true. I have many idea and dream, and you may say, well, that's worth nothing. Ya, I know, I don't have money now, but don't under estimate the power of mind and dream for everything start simple, everything start with an idea, a dream, unless you are someone who don't believe, that I don't blame you, coz believing is not something easy, things are easier said then done, bad things always happen to good people, but whatever happens, if we stop believing, I guess that's the end of the road, and you will never be back on your feet again, but whatever that is, always believe and try to understand things in a good way, I guess eventually things will have it's own course.

One thing I always stress out is that always remember money is very important, those who say money is not everything, mmm, try saying that to a poor guy, or someone in hospital that have no money to pay, but never be greedy coz that's the part that God saw in you and make karma bite you in your ass somehow. Money is important and so is life and everything else in the package of life, so try to understand, what is it that you want, why can't you let go or how things works and maybe just maybe, you will find your way to the lights...

Anyway, money, is how you look at it, it's how you find your balance with it, don't let money control you, don't let greed control you, let you control money, I guess that's it, I'm not sure yet how, I'm still learning about my mind and money and many things, and I still am not a millionaire, so I don't have money to do any experiment yet, hahaha, if I ever become one hahaha then maybe I'll write something about it, haha

After so much that I write here, now I really wanted to write books, but erm, with my English and my spelling, oh gosh, I guess no one will buy or will ever understand what I'm trying to express T_T" and writing this alone took me 4 hours coz I need to read it again and again to correct my spelling T_T and grammar, if I know what that is... >.<"

Anyway, life is hard with crazy & psycho things happening in my life, with family problems, tho they are nothing compare to the wolfs out there, you know what I mean...

but wow, I'm still alive and kicking and I'm not crazy so I guess, that's good rite :) 

till next time, if I'm still alive & kicking XD 

14 Ways to Save Money on Groceries

This is the best article ever that I really really have to share it here ^^, 

things in my fridge always spoil and I wonder why 

but with the useful tips below share by Country Living & Shine from yahoo! 

I can save some money & keep my things nice & fresh ... ^^,

awesome ^^,

14 Ways to 

Save Money on Groceries 

by Country Living, on Wed Feb 2, 2011 9:45am PST

Save money and trips to the market with these tips and tricks from Rebecca DiLiberto’s Penny Saving Household Helper. You’ll be surprised how simple it is to keep food at its best.

1. Line the bottom of your refrigerator’s crisper drawer with paper towels. They’ll absorb the excess moisture that causes vegetables to rot.

2. To keep herbs tasting fresh for up to a month, store whole bunches, washed and sealed in plastic bags, in the freezer. When you need them, they’ll be easier to chop, and they’ll defrost the minute they hit a hot pan.

3. A bay leaf slipped into a container of flour, pasta, or rice will help repel bugs.

4. Stop cheese from drying out by spreading butter or margarine on the cut sides to seal in moisture. This is most effective with hard cheeses sealed in wax.

5. When radishes, celery, or carrots have lost their crunch, simply pop them in a bowl of iced water along with a slice of raw potato and watch the limp vegetables freshen up right before your eyes.

6. Avoid separating bananas until you plan to eat them – they spoil less quickly in a bunch.

7. Put rice in your saltshaker to stop the salt from hardening. The rice absorbs condensation that can cause clumps.

8. Stock up on butter when it’s on sale – you can store it in the freezer for up to six months. Pack the butter in an airtight container, so it doesn’t take on the flavor of whatever else you’re freezing.

9. In order to make cottage cheese or sour cream last longer, place the container upside down in the fridge. Inverting the tub creates a vacuum that inhibits the growth of bacteria that causes food to spoil.

10. Believe it or not, honey is the only nonperishable food substance, so don’t get rid of the stuff if it crystallizes or becomes cloudy. Microwave on medium heat, in 30-second increments, to make honey clear again.

11. Prevent extra cooked pasta from hardening by stashing it in a sealed plastic bag and refrigerating. When you’re ready to serve, throw the pasta in boiling water for a few seconds to heat and restore moisture.

12. Keeping brown sugar in the freezer will stop it from hardening. But if you already have hardened sugar on your shelf, soften it by sealing in a bag with a slice of bread – or by microwaving on high for 30 seconds.

13. If you only need a few drops of lemon juice, avoid cutting the lemon in half – it will dry out quickly. Instead, puncture the fruit with a metal skewer and squeeze out exactly what you require.

14. If you’re unsure of an egg’s freshness, see how it behaves in a cup of water: Fresh eggs sink; bad ones float.

Plus:  Learn the tricks to keeping food fresh longer so your food dollars don’t go to waste.

Subscribe to Country Living magazine and explore CountryLiving.com!

more than tired but happy to have them

I have been really busy, so busy that I have no time to do anything and now I guess I will be more busy because I will need to set up another 2 blog, one for for the art work that I share with my fiance and the other is for my work, then there's the twitter and FB that needed to be set up and oh gosh.. it is just so tiring >.<

anyway, I will just have to try to have fun and try my best to post things in the future..

There's this new blog that I have set up and it's called mimpee, mimpee means dream in malay and why mimpee you may say, coz it's my and my fiance name so we called it mimpee, it's an art site of ours that I hope I can have the time to keep it up ^^, so I have copy some of the starting here ^^, enjoy......

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

mimpee first journey to Threadless

mimpee two mind one world, just started today wednesday 17th November 2010.

It's a reason to celebrate so we decided to have great dinner later ^^. hehehe

It's a slow journey into the world of arts but with two head and one heart, I bet we can slowly make it ^^.

Anyway. I Frist saw Threadless thru jimmy tan arts of tshirt and it's really pretty awesome ^^. Those tees are just breath taking, and I just wanna grab all of them. Thru jimmy tan, I slowly know Threadless, then I meet flying mouse 365, in person, and it was so awesome, it's was then the thunder strike our two mind ^^, flying mouse 365 is an awesome designer from Threadless, he encourage me and songpe to join Threadless and told us all the fun and the community, he told us to check it out, and say, you guys should join you know, and from there we decided to check it out real serious this time and join in the fun of Threadless.

Firstly, we both decided to join in Threadless as one, so we decided a name, my name and my finance name plus together is mimpee and mimpee sounds like "mimpi" a malay name for dream, so our name has been officially launch mimpee ^^.

Next, songpe decided to draw out an avatar for both of us, and we both decided to use our soft toy pet elephant and seal as our avatar ^^, but he make it ugly, funny and cute ^^.

For me, I created our email, FB and yup ^^, this blog mimpee.blogspot.com

I will try update our avatar news week.. if I can >.<

So stay tune to this new blog ...

Thanks ^^

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Threadless is more than a tees seller, an artist creator, and a tees arts community, it's more and more

To me @ first sight, Threadless is an arts of tees, it is a statement. I'm sure if you wear a Threadless Tess out, all your friends are gonna ask, where you get it from? coz I know I will certainly ask, coz the Tees are just too awesome to miss, don't believe me? Check out yourself @ Threadless and you will understand what I mean.

Threadless is just so much fun, artist can submit their design to Threadless and community can comment and decide if they will buy it or not, the Forum is a place to discuss, then there is the awesome videos about tees and stuff, also there is an artist programs where it's shows ways for artist to get really involved and ofcoz there's designer interview and you can chat with Threadless members too. Oh, not forgetting the Street Team. Street Team is one of Threadless many program for earing point. All too good to be true? Ya I know... ^^

So, if you are an artist, the more you should join in Threadless and submit your art work, but what about if you are not an artist? then the more you should check out Threadless, because it is just too awesome to be missed out..

5 Reasons to Skip the Diamond Engagement Ring

This is something that I really want to share it with people. A diamond ring don't mean happy ever after, it only mean that your future hubby can afford it, but what if he can't but really just wants you to be happy, and he is forcing himself to buy diamond and end up owing money to the bank, would you be happy to see men chasing money from your hubby? 

Every bride wish a posh weeding and a diamond ring, because in their mind, it means happy ever after, but does it? Diamond is so marketed in everyone's mind, that everybody though it means forever, but it's actually a marketing gimmick to bring everyone to love it and buy it.

Anyway, is it worth it to put stress of wanting a diamond ring even before you get married? mmm, I hope after you finish reading the article below, you would cherish more and care more about the one you love and only advice your love one, on what he can afford but not on what he can't +.+"   

I guess everyone would be happier base on what they need, not on what they want, cause if everything is base on wants, there will be a never ending list, and the list goes on and on and it will make you more miserable because it means owing bank more and paying more interest and more stress.. so it's up to you to decide.. wants or needs.... but if you are really the few lucky' ones that have money to spend, mmm, it's all up to you ...

Happy reading...  

5 Reasons to Skip the Diamond Engagement Ring

Wise Bread, On Wednesday 11 August 2010, 1:12 SGT

You're ready. You have the entire scene planned out in your head, every detail plotted and mapped until it's perfect. At the climax of this mini-drama, he will bend on one knee and present to you a beautiful diamond ring -- or, if you're the one proposing, you will watch as her expression changes from surprise to utter delight when she sees the ring. And that's when you'll know: Yes, you're getting married.

Or so the diamond industry would like you to believe. The sole purpose of this appealing fantasy is to drum up sales. Once you look past the mythos of the diamond engagement ring, you'll see that it's not much more than a shiny rock. (See also 24 secrets from a 24-year-old happy marriage.) Here are five good reasons to skip the diamond engagement ring.

1. It isn't an ancient tradition -- just marketing. For all intents and purposes, "A Diamond is Forever" and the idea of a diamond engagement ring is Sprite's "Obey Your Thirst" and Nike's "Just Do It." It is Gary Dahl's "Pet Rock." De Beers controlled supply by buying up and closing down any diamond mine discovered, and they controlled demand by making it sentimental. Although the campaign is less than 70 years old, it has made the diamond engagement ring the ultimate symbol of how much the relationship, the girl, and love itself is worth.

2. Diamonds are rare! Or not. It's true, diamonds are abundant. For generations, De Beers had stockpiled most of the world's diamond supply and effectively monopolized the industry. Their dominance has weakened over the last decade, but De Beers and its competitors still control the supply of diamonds entering the market. While most gems are valued based on their rarity, diamonds are different. Their scarcity is artificial -- and so is their value.

3. Other options look just as impressive and cost much less. Moissanite looks just like a diamond; the difference is undetectable with the naked eye. In fact, moissanite is actually more brilliant. If, for whatever reason, you're stuck on the diamond ring idea, synthetic or "cultured" diamonds are the real deal. They're made in a machine that replicates the environmental forces that make diamonds. They're real diamonds, only with less flaws. A synthetic 2-carat pink diamond costs just a few thousand dollars, and a 1-carat moissanite ring is under $1000.

4. You can invest in something more meaningful/useful/fun than a piece of jewelry. Many women simply enjoy having a beautiful collection -- and that's fine (if you can afford it). For most people, though, a diamond engagement ring is fun to show off for about 30 seconds. But it's special, right? Because it marks your engagement and symbolizes your love? Remember, that's De Beers's marketing campaign talking. Three-plus months' salary would be better spent on furnishing your home, an amazing trip, or your future kids' college funds!

5. It's hard to get around the ethical issues surrounding the diamond industry. Terrorist groups use conflict/blood diamonds to finance their activities. Rebel groups use them to fuel conflict and civil wars. In these conflict zones, children are being used as soldiers. The Kimberley Process is an agreement that was established to prevent conflict diamonds from getting into the market, but the self-policing system is far from perfect. One way to fool the Kimberley Process is to smuggle and mix conflict diamonds with legally traded ones before being certified -- and you, the buyer, would be none the wiser.

http://sg.finance.yahoo.com/news/5-Reasons-to-Skip-the-Diamond-usnews-3977341679.html?x=0